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How to deal with separation anxiety when children start daycare.

Separation anxiety is a common challenge many parents face, particularly in young children, when they begin attending childcare or face moments of being apart from their primary caregivers. It's natural for babies and toddlers to feel uneasy when separated from those they trust most. Understanding this behavior and knowing how to handle it can help both parents and children navigate this developmental phase smoothly.



What is Separation Anxiety?

Separation anxiety refers to a child's fear or distress when separated from their caregiver. It typically begins to appear between 6-12 months of age and can last into early childhood. This anxiety is a normal part of development and reflects the growing attachment a child feels toward their parents. Children at this age are learning that people and objects continue to exist, even when out of sight (known as object permanence), but they don’t yet have the confidence to cope with being apart from their caregivers.

Although separation anxiety is common, it can feel overwhelming for parents. The good news is, with the right strategies, you can help ease your child's fears and make transitions smoother.


5 Steps to Help Manage Separation Anxiety


1. Practice Short Separations

One of the best ways to ease your child into longer separations is by starting small. Practice leaving your child with a trusted caregiver or family member for short periods. As they become more comfortable, gradually increase the length of time you're away. This helps them learn that you will always come back, building trust and confidence over time.

2. Create a Goodbye Routine

Having a consistent, predictable goodbye routine can help reduce your child's anxiety. This routine could involve a quick hug, a kiss, or a special phrase like “See you soon!” Keeping your goodbyes brief and consistent sends the message that you are confident about leaving and that they are safe with their caregiver. Drawing out the goodbye can increase anxiety, so it's important to keep it quick yet loving.

3. Stay Calm and Positive

Children pick up on their parents’ emotions, so staying calm and positive when leaving can help reduce their anxiety. If you appear anxious or upset, your child may feel the same way. On the other hand, if you’re cheerful and confident, your child is more likely to feel secure. Try to avoid sneaking away, as this can lead to more anxiety and distrust.


4. Provide Comfort Items

Many children find comfort in having a favorite blanket, stuffed animal, or other familiar items when separating from their caregivers. These "transitional objects" can provide a sense of security and help soothe them during times of stress. Make sure your child has access to these items during times of separation, whether they’re going to childcare or being cared for by someone else.


5. Offer Reassurance and Talk About Their Feelings

Reassure your child by reminding them that their feelings are valid and normal. Let them know that it’s okay to feel sad when you leave but that they are in a safe place and you will always return. For toddlers and older children, talking about their feelings and helping them express their emotions through words, play, or drawing can provide an outlet for their anxiety.

Separation anxiety can be tough on both children and parents, but it’s important to remember that it’s a normal part of development. With patience, understanding, and the right strategies, this phase can be managed, leading to stronger bonds and a more independent child.

If your child is struggling with separation anxiety at My Precious Angels Childcare, don’t hesitate to speak with our staff. We're here to provide support and make this transition as smooth as possible for both you and your child. Together, we can help your little one feel safe and confident in their new environment.


Bonus Tip: Be Consistent

Routine and consistency are key when it comes to managing separation anxiety. Stick to regular drop-off times and routines, and make sure your child knows what to expect. When they can predict what will happen, it helps them feel more in control, reducing their anxiety.

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